


Astra

by driftingskies237



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Arthur Knows About Merlin's Magic (Merlin), Caring Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Court Sorcerer Merlin (Merlin), Established Relationship, Fluff, Future Fic, M/M, Magic is legalized, Worried Merlin (Merlin)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2020-12-23
Packaged: 2021-03-10 21:47:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,608
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28254147
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/driftingskies237/pseuds/driftingskies237
Summary: With magic legalized in Camelot, Merlin has to adjust to his changing role and the responsibilities that come with it. When the opportunity arises for Merlin to study under a far away group of druids, Merlin hesitates, not wanting to leave Arthur. There’s a simple solution, of course: Merlin just won’t tell him.Merthur week day 2
Relationships: Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin)
Comments: 17
Kudos: 125
Collections: Merthur Week 2020





	Astra

“You’re thinking too loud,” Arthur mutters as he drops an arm around Merlin from behind. The duo is currently curled up in Arthur’s bed, exhausted from another day of the seemingly endless negotiations they’ve had to deal with since legalizing magic.

“At least I’m capable of intelligent thought,” Merlin shoots back.

Arthur shifts suddenly, ice cold hands sneaking under Merlin’s shirt and onto his bare stomach. Merlin yelps, scootching away from him as Arthur laughs.

“You prat! What was that for?” Merlin glares, sitting up with his arms protecting his torso.

“For insulting my intelligence!”

“I can’t insult what you don’t have.”

Arthur tackles Merlin back down onto the bed, so he’s lying flat on his back with Arthur pressing down into him. They playfight, landing kicks and punches that have no real power behind them. Merlin is giggling, and Arthur can’t wipe the beautiful grin off his face as he hovers above Merlin, blonde hair tousled.

“Why do I put up with you?” Arthur questions teasingly. “You’re a menace.”

“That’s the nicest thing you’ve ever said to me!” Merlin says, pretending to sniffle.

With one last half-hearted slap to Merlin’s arm, Arthur flops beside him. They both turn toward each other, so close that Merlin can see the barely noticeable freckles dotting Arthur’s cheeks. Arthur nuzzles into Merlin’s palm as he reaches up and runs a thumb over the freckles and down the outline of his jaw. Arthur reaches for Merlin to pull him in closer.

“If you put your freezing hands on me again, they’re coming off.”

Arthur rolls his eyes. “I promise. Now go to sleep, _Mer_ lin. You can think tomorrow.”

Like usual, Arthur falls asleep right after he shuts his eyes. Normally, Merlin would listen to the steady drum of his heart and the soft snores and drift off himself, but tonight is different. Because Arthur was right, he is thinking about something. Something that could potentially change Merlin’s life.

It all started when a far away magical kingdom came to visit for peace treaties. Ever since the legalization of magic and the initiation of Merlin as the Court Sorcerer, druids and other magical kingdoms have been coming to have negotiations with Camelot. Despite the tediousness of the constant meetings that Merlin is now required to be present (and alert) at, Merlin couldn’t help but get excited over this new era of Camelot. The most recent magical kingdom, named Astra, was of particular interest to Merlin. Until recently, no one knew much of the far away kingdom filled with magical beings of all sorts, so Merlin was eager to learn all about it. After meeting a few of the delegates of Astra, Merlin became even more fascinated with the kingdom. And the delegates of Astra were all so kind to Merlin, not taking offense at any of his many questions. Even outside of meetings the last few days, some of the delegates have continued to talk to Merlin about being Emrys, instinctual magic, and some of their own practices in Astra. Merlin enjoyed these chats, figuring he could at least get some new allies out of it. However, he soon found out that the delegates of Astra had another motive to coming to Camelot. Merlin can still hear their offer ringing through his head, the offer that has caused his overthinking that night as he lies in bed beside Arthur.

_“We’d like to offer you an opportunity to study with us in Astra…”_

_“…We have an extensive collection of spells and the best teachers…”_

_“…We’d also be honored to learn from Emrys, and teach you in return…”_

_“…You could get to know our customs, our people, act as a beacon of hope for other sorcerers for a year and bring back what you learned to Camelot.”_

Listening to their offer, Merlin thought it sounded like a dream come true. Learning magic under experienced sorcerers? Living in a city full of magical people? Helping teach others what he’s learned? Traveling to a distant land with endless possibilities? Everything about it sounded wonderful. If they had asked years ago, Merlin would have said yes with no hesitation. But with Merlin’s life currently, there would be so much more to consider.

Gaius would probably be okay on his own, but Merlin would miss him dearly. He knows that Gaius would encourage him to go despite how much they may miss each other. His position of Court Sorcerer was also of concern, but as Court Sorcerer, Merlin knows this would be a great opportunity to expand his knowledge and expand peace across the land with sorcerers. He would miss his friends dearly, but they were all busy with training and court proceedings, as well. Really, everything could function fine with him leaving for a while. But that left one problem.

Arthur.

Merlin can’t leave Arthur, not now. Not when magic is newly legalized, when Arthur is depending on him. Not when their relationship is still budding.

Every time that Merlin has considered accepting the offer, an overwhelming sense of guilt and fear has enclosed him. He can’t just leave Arthur, not after everything they’ve been through, even if he will be back. A year is such a long time to be away from each other, and Merlin fears they wouldn’t last if he left.

So, in that moment, with Arthur snoozing away beside him, mouth open with drool on the corner of his lips, Merlin knows he has to do two things: First, he has to reject the offer. Second, he can never let anyone find out, because if they did, they would only encourage him to go.

Sighing, Merlin burrows deeper into the covers until he’s comfortable. In his sleep, Arthur mutters random strings of sounds, cuddling into Merlin’s side.

_Yes, I have to stay. For Arthur. **For us**. _

…

Negotiations with Astra are at the end. Although Arthur has enjoyed having the delegates, he’s ready for things to get back to normal. Negotiations for peace talks are always a bit stressful, even with such a welcoming kingdom as Astra. All of the delegates have been extremely kind and thankful toward Arthur the entire time, making the negotiations much smoother than most. Arthur also noticed that during their time in Camelot, the delegates also made much talk with Merlin.

Arthur knew before the Astra delegates even arrived that Merlin was excited. Arthur himself was very curious, but Merlin’s eagerness far exceeded that curiosity. Arthur became worried that the delegates may not be as opening and friendly as Merlin hoped, but thankfully they were even ore so than expected. And Arthur could tell how happy it made Merlin to talk to them, delegates of a magical kingdom with hundreds of sorcerers. Arthur noticed how they even talked outside of council meetings, chatting about random topics with glee.

And now, with the Astra delegates leaving tomorrow, Arthur has also noticed how Merlin’s mood has fallen. Sure, he still has his dorky smile stuck on his face, but Arthur can read Merlin’s emotions better than his own by now. He easily sees the underlying sadness adorning Merlin. At first, Arthur just assumes it’s because his new friends from Astra have to leave, but is seems like something else is going on.

“Are you alright?” Arthur accosts Merlin that afternoon during a break.

Merlin shuffles his feet and adjusts his neckerchief, two of his tells that he’s feeling uncomfortable. “Yes, I’m fine.”

“You don’t seem fine.”

“I promise I’m fine.”

“Merlin, you can tell me. I won’t make fun of you. Much.”

Merlin rolls his eyes, and a smile twitches at his lips in amusement. He reaches over and squeezes Arthur’s hand, although it seems to be to reassure himself more than Arthur. “ _I’m fine_ , Arthur, I’m just going to miss having more sorcerers to talk with.”

“Well, these successful negotiations should pave the way for more sorcerers to come to Camelot and understand they’re protected,” Arthur says.

“Yeah, of course. You’re right, clotpole.”

“I always am.”

Merlin chuckles, “And so modest, too.”

With that, Arthur assumes it’s solved. Merlin still seems a bit down, but looks somewhat happier. Arthur decides to leave it be. That is, until a delegate comes to talk to him that night at the final feast.

…

“I appreciate your hospitality, King Arthur,” The delegate, Sir Carter, says, approaching the King during the festivities of the feast when everyone is mingling about.

“The pleasure is all mine, Sir Carter. It’s been an honor negotiating the treaty with you and the rest of the Astra delegates. I hope you have enjoyed your stay in Camelot,” Arthur replies.

“Very much, sire.”

Their conversation is briefly interrupted by a large bout of laughter that Arthur would recognize anywhere. Across the floor a little ways and chatting with some of the other delegates and Camelot’s knights is Merlin, who is laughing along with the group and gesturing wildly. Noticing Arthur’s gaze, Sir Carter smiles.

“Court Sorcerer Merlin was also very enjoyable company. He’s been very interested in our culture,” Sir Carter offers.

“I bet he protested you calling him ‘Court Sorcerer Merlin’ as soon as you said it,” Arthur says.

Sir Carter chuckles, “Aye, sire. Straight away. He’s a great person, and a talented warlock. It’s a shame he declined our offer.”

Arthur perks up. “Offer?”

“Well, yes sire. We offered Merlin to travel with us to Astra to study for a year as well as teach our people himself. We were all a bit disappointed when he said no since we’ve become such good friends, but all is well in the end. Did you not know, Sire?”

Arthur doesn’t respond, not even considering the rudeness of it, because he can’t stop thinking about what Sir Carter just told him. Merlin received an offer to go to Astra? A kingdom in which outsiders have rarely seen, and magic has been established for generations, and Merlin said no?

“Excuse me, Sir Carter,” Arthur states, nodding before walking off hurriedly toward the group Merlin continues to talk with.

Merlin’s eyes light up as he spots Arthur, but he quickly turns confused as he sees Arthur’s serious countenance. As the others spot him, there is a chorus of greetings, and Arthur enacts his kingly smile toward them all before heading straight to Merlin.

“What brings you to this neck of the woods, sire?” Merlin asks.

Arthur sighs, “We need to talk. Come with me?”

It’s formed as a question, but both of them know that it’s a statement. Merlin nods, and his smile is strained as he turns back to the group to say goodnight. Arthur allows him the time before leading him out of the crowded room. Not wanting anyone to listen in on their conversation, Arthur decides to head back to their chambers. Merlin stays silent the whole way.

When they arrive, Merlin turns to give Arthur a strange look. “What is this about?” Based on Merlin’s careful wording, Arthur figures Merlin can probably guess what it’s about.

“Why did you decline the offer to go study in Astra?” Arthur questions.

“I have too much to do here as Court Sorcerer.”

“That’s a lie, and we both know it. Merlin, I know how excited you were to learn about Astra and how you’ve always wanted to learn from experienced sorcerers. This opportunity is perfect for you!”

“Really, Arthur, I can’t just abandon my duties—”

“Your duties can wait! You’ll gain even more experience for your position—”

“But my friends—”

“—Would want you to go! Why are you hesitating so much?”

Merlin throws his hands up, face turning red, and shouts, “Because, you prat, I don’t want to leave _you!_ I can’t lose you, Arthur, not when I just got you.”

Arthur sighs, stepping toward the now distraught warlock. He reaches down to undo Merlin’s clenched hands, threading his fingers through Merlin’s own. They face each other, intertwined fingers between them. Merlin pointedly looks at the ground, feet moving slightly.

“And you said _I_ was lacking intelligence,” Arthur mentions. “You’re not going to lose me, you idiot. And, contrary to what you may believe, I can survive on my own.”

Merlin sends him an incredulous look, and Arthur amends his claim.

“Fine. I can survive without you because I’m protected by all of our knights and allies. I know you feel like you always have to take care of me, but you never think about taking care of yourself. Even if you don’t realize it now, Merlin, I can tell this is something your really want. Something you need, even. And as much as I’ll miss your inane prattle, I’ll be here when you get back, waiting for you.”

A tear slides down Merlin’s face, and Arthur wipes it away.

“Arthur,” Merlin begins, “A-Are you sure? I can’t ask you to wait. I’ll be gone a whole year. Who knows what will change! And what if there’s a threat while I’m gone—”

“I can ask the druids for help if there’s a threat, or send word to you. And things may change Merlin, but I won’t stop loving you, I can promise that. Even if you are an idiot.”

“You’re an idiot,” Merlin mutters, voice thick with tears. “Honestly, at least I’ll get a decent night’s sleep in Astra since you won’t be snoring in my ear.”

“I do not snore!”

Merlin snorts, bringing him into a hug. Arthur returns the embrace, enjoying the feeling of Merlin pressed up against his chest, trying to memorize every little feeling of the moment. The way Merlin’s fingers tighten into the fabric of his shirt. The smell of wine, the warmth between them, the sound of their breaths in each other’s ears. Arthur swears he’ll remember this exact moment far after Merlin goes to Astra.

“I love you.”

Arthur tightens his arms around Merlin’s frame. “I love you, too.”

* * *

It’s time to say goodbye. Merlin is all packed the next morning, standing with the rest of the Astra delegates who are ready to head out. After talking to his friends and Gaius last night, who all also encouraged him to go, Merlin decided for certain that he would go to Astra. Arthur accompanies Merlin to the gates and pretends that he’s simply seeing the Astra court off, but everyone knows he’s mostly there to say his goodbyes to Merlin.

“We’ll take good care of him, Sire, I promise,” Sir Carter says from atop a horse.

“You better,” Arthur responds, half-joking and half-extremely serious.

“Don’t forget to bathe, or eat every meal, or put your shirt on straight—” Merlin begins.

Arthur shuts him up with a breathless kiss.

“—or to comb your hair,” Merlin finishes when they separate.

“I am perfectly capable of all that without your help,” Arthur says. “Although I’m not sure how you’ll survive without seeing my handsome face everyday…”

Merlin laughs, leaning forward to press another kiss to his cheek. “I’ll miss you so much.”

“I’ll miss you too. And Merlin? I’m so _proud_ of you. You’re going to love it.”

Merlin smiles his gentle smile, one reserved especially for Arthur. “I’ll write to you all the time. Aithusa can deliver our letters.”

“Great. I’m so looking forward to a baby dragon giving me my very flammable mail.”

They chuckle together, before realizing that it’s definitely time for Merlin to leave. One year apart, an entire year, but they both know it’s for the best. Merlin has wanted to learn for ages, wanted nothing but to help others and improve his knowledge. This is the right thing to do.

With one last kiss, Merlin hops atop his horse, and heads into the unknown.


End file.
